I know. I put "lufe" instead of "life." it wasn't intentional. I'm blogging from my phone and the keyboard is tiny. It's usually pretty good at correcting words for me but it likes "lufe" apparently. I was going to correct it myself but thought I should just leave it for effect. I'm blogging from my phone because the ibterneh is down at work. Internet I mean.
Anywho, today is and will continue to be the most boring day of my life. It's snowing in Oregon. Actually it's not snowing. It rained last night and now it's 37 degrees so that's cause for people to think that the roads are covered with ice so no one cones to work. Except me. But Angie is not here. There's no Internet. Best. Day. Ever.
Please excuse any typos
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
okay, so I am homeless
There's something heart breaking about hearing your best friend of forever scream at you at the top of her lungs, "Get the fuck outta my house!!" When it's our house and it's been our house for several months.
I refused to pay rent for December, for obvious reasons. I told her this last Friday, but I guess she misunderstood. I was shocked that anyone paid rent, and felt sorry for those who did. Our house is condemned. The landlord terminated the lease because the house will not be inhabitable until March. He gave us 30 days to get out.
Tell me, am I being ridiculous for refusing to pay rent? I don't think so. There's a big sign on the plastic door with a biohazard symbol that says "WARNING: DO NOT ENTER." It's fucking condemned.
I furiously grabbed some things, just enough for a day and my space heater.
I was so angry when I was arguing with Adrienne. I left hysterical--bawling and crying like I had just been dumped. I've never felt so weak and so alone. I don't have a support system here aside from my roommates, so I did the stupidest thing I could do. I called a guy I've been seeing. This guy is great, I really like him, but I feel that we're not exactly on the same page. I feel like I'm smothering him for it being a new relationship. We're not a couple. But I called him like we were. I was crying and told him the situation. He calmed me down and I felt better, but I acted like a small child in the woods who comes upon a wild animal and runs toward it screaming and clapping. Now I fear that I won't hear from him again. I just clapped too hard.
I drove to my friends Alex and Jameson. I called first and asked to crash on their couch. When I got there, I was still visibly upset and we proceeded to get drunk off--you guessed it--Jameson whiskey. They started watching a dvd and I fell asleep. I woke up at about 5 freezing (they don't have heat). I lied there for a while weeping. I was thinking about all the shit on my plate. I hate eating shit, but sometimes shit happens. I returned all the Christmas gifts I purchased. I just don't know how I'm going to come up with some money to move into a new place.
This blog is for venting purposes, too.
I refused to pay rent for December, for obvious reasons. I told her this last Friday, but I guess she misunderstood. I was shocked that anyone paid rent, and felt sorry for those who did. Our house is condemned. The landlord terminated the lease because the house will not be inhabitable until March. He gave us 30 days to get out.
Tell me, am I being ridiculous for refusing to pay rent? I don't think so. There's a big sign on the plastic door with a biohazard symbol that says "WARNING: DO NOT ENTER." It's fucking condemned.
I furiously grabbed some things, just enough for a day and my space heater.
I was so angry when I was arguing with Adrienne. I left hysterical--bawling and crying like I had just been dumped. I've never felt so weak and so alone. I don't have a support system here aside from my roommates, so I did the stupidest thing I could do. I called a guy I've been seeing. This guy is great, I really like him, but I feel that we're not exactly on the same page. I feel like I'm smothering him for it being a new relationship. We're not a couple. But I called him like we were. I was crying and told him the situation. He calmed me down and I felt better, but I acted like a small child in the woods who comes upon a wild animal and runs toward it screaming and clapping. Now I fear that I won't hear from him again. I just clapped too hard.
I drove to my friends Alex and Jameson. I called first and asked to crash on their couch. When I got there, I was still visibly upset and we proceeded to get drunk off--you guessed it--Jameson whiskey. They started watching a dvd and I fell asleep. I woke up at about 5 freezing (they don't have heat). I lied there for a while weeping. I was thinking about all the shit on my plate. I hate eating shit, but sometimes shit happens. I returned all the Christmas gifts I purchased. I just don't know how I'm going to come up with some money to move into a new place.
This blog is for venting purposes, too.
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
The Kitchen Womb
Guess what! I'm not homeless! I never thought I'd be so happy to be not homeless. Homelessness has never been a huge concern of mine, I always just figured that I'd have a room in which to sleep and a kitchen in which to cook. For all of you who take shelter for granted, have shame. It can be plucked away from you in two shakes of a lamb's tail if you're not careful... or have a broken dishwasher.
So, to elaborate on my last post a little: we had the genius dishwasher replacement man come by our house to do his job, and he pulled out the dishwasher and said, "you guys have a serious mold problem" and I'm in fear for my life. Then he shot through the window like a bat outta hell with a trail of smoke behind him. Okay, so I made that last part up, but he high-tailed it. Long story short, "mold experts" tore out the floors, counters, cabinents, drywall.. pretty much everything in the kitchen and the basement. All of the basement's contents (including 2 roommates) are now in the living room. Oh! and same with the kitchen's contents. So, basically, I live in a madhouse... with cats.... and lots of roommates... that live in the living room. yay?
They've plastict off the kitchen and basement with an elaborate plastic thingy and lots of tape. It requires one to unzip and zip to go in and out. It's kinda funny lookin though. The other day Chris came through the "zip door" with a basket of laundry and it looked like the kitchen gave birth to him. I think mold spores have a way of not being able to penetrate through tape and plastic. It's like a lead barrier.
On the bright side, we'll have a brand new kitchen when this disaster is over. I'm being pretty upbeat about it. If I bitch and complain, I fear my life, because it's the roommates in the basement that are really inconvenienced. I'm glad I don't have to awaken with people hanging out in my room watching TV everyday.
ah, everyday truly is an adventure.
So, to elaborate on my last post a little: we had the genius dishwasher replacement man come by our house to do his job, and he pulled out the dishwasher and said, "you guys have a serious mold problem" and I'm in fear for my life. Then he shot through the window like a bat outta hell with a trail of smoke behind him. Okay, so I made that last part up, but he high-tailed it. Long story short, "mold experts" tore out the floors, counters, cabinents, drywall.. pretty much everything in the kitchen and the basement. All of the basement's contents (including 2 roommates) are now in the living room. Oh! and same with the kitchen's contents. So, basically, I live in a madhouse... with cats.... and lots of roommates... that live in the living room. yay?
They've plastict off the kitchen and basement with an elaborate plastic thingy and lots of tape. It requires one to unzip and zip to go in and out. It's kinda funny lookin though. The other day Chris came through the "zip door" with a basket of laundry and it looked like the kitchen gave birth to him. I think mold spores have a way of not being able to penetrate through tape and plastic. It's like a lead barrier.
On the bright side, we'll have a brand new kitchen when this disaster is over. I'm being pretty upbeat about it. If I bitch and complain, I fear my life, because it's the roommates in the basement that are really inconvenienced. I'm glad I don't have to awaken with people hanging out in my room watching TV everyday.
ah, everyday truly is an adventure.
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Mold Rocks!
broken dishwasher + floor = mold
mold + 4-5 months = dangerous levels of mold
dangerous levels of mold = homeless Claire! For at least 2 weeks!! WOOT!
by the way, that was the most sarcastic "woot" in the history of "woots."
mold + 4-5 months = dangerous levels of mold
dangerous levels of mold = homeless Claire! For at least 2 weeks!! WOOT!
by the way, that was the most sarcastic "woot" in the history of "woots."
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Bassnectar
My cousin, Scott, who has been in the Army for his entire adult life, was in town from the Philapines to see his baby in North Carolina being born. He was on base in Tacoma, so he came into Portland last Friday to see his dear Cousin Claire. Now, Scott is straight as an arrow. He hardly drinks, doesn't do drugs and I don't think he goes out too much. So, where did I decide to take him for a night on the town? A rave.
My friend Jameson told me about a Bassnectar show at the Wonder Ballroom for $20, and I really, really wanted to go. I asked Scott if he was into it, and he agreed, so we ran some menial errands with Jameson and went to the venue to pick up some tickets. Jameson warned us that the last time he tried to get into the Wonder Ballroom, it sold out. We decided to get there pretty early to ensure that we get enough tickets for me, Scott, Jameson, Alex and Nate (my guys). The guy at the bar said the doors opened at 8:30, and tickets would be available then. So Jameson waited at the box office and was first in line at 8:15. Scott and I decided to go pick up Nate. Pushing through some hassle with the door guy, we finally got our tickets and entered the venue (the show was completely sold out by 9:30).
The Wonder Ballroom is basically just one big open room with a balcony and a bar on each level. We started out the night hating the opening djs, and standing on the balcony drinking $4 16 oz PBRs. Yes, I know, that sounds delicious, and trust me, they were. Anyway, we just kinda talked and drank and finally, bassnectar went on. Finally.
The main floor was packed. Literally packed. You couldn't walk through to save your life. However, I have a gifted ability to walk through enormous crowds with little effort. Here's the secret: just run through people as fast as you can. It's extremely rude, but it works. People get over it... eventually. Anyway, we got to the very front of the floor. Right in front of the stage. I don't know if any of you have ever heard bassnectar, but the music is compelling.... you have to dance. We started getting down like there was no tomorrow. The air was thick with smoke and sweat. You could barely breathe that close to the stage. There's no keeping your clothes on, it's just too damn hot, so we took our shirts off and danced the night away.
Scott had a blast. I've never seen him like that. It was almost funny to see him move and sway to the beat with his shirt off and sweating. I was so happy to see him so happy.
All in all, it was a great reunion. He headed out to North Carolina on Saturday morning before I woke up. I wish him luck with the baby and congratulations.
I took a few pics at the show:
Good God, Good Show.
My friend Jameson told me about a Bassnectar show at the Wonder Ballroom for $20, and I really, really wanted to go. I asked Scott if he was into it, and he agreed, so we ran some menial errands with Jameson and went to the venue to pick up some tickets. Jameson warned us that the last time he tried to get into the Wonder Ballroom, it sold out. We decided to get there pretty early to ensure that we get enough tickets for me, Scott, Jameson, Alex and Nate (my guys). The guy at the bar said the doors opened at 8:30, and tickets would be available then. So Jameson waited at the box office and was first in line at 8:15. Scott and I decided to go pick up Nate. Pushing through some hassle with the door guy, we finally got our tickets and entered the venue (the show was completely sold out by 9:30).
The Wonder Ballroom is basically just one big open room with a balcony and a bar on each level. We started out the night hating the opening djs, and standing on the balcony drinking $4 16 oz PBRs. Yes, I know, that sounds delicious, and trust me, they were. Anyway, we just kinda talked and drank and finally, bassnectar went on. Finally.
The main floor was packed. Literally packed. You couldn't walk through to save your life. However, I have a gifted ability to walk through enormous crowds with little effort. Here's the secret: just run through people as fast as you can. It's extremely rude, but it works. People get over it... eventually. Anyway, we got to the very front of the floor. Right in front of the stage. I don't know if any of you have ever heard bassnectar, but the music is compelling.... you have to dance. We started getting down like there was no tomorrow. The air was thick with smoke and sweat. You could barely breathe that close to the stage. There's no keeping your clothes on, it's just too damn hot, so we took our shirts off and danced the night away.
Scott had a blast. I've never seen him like that. It was almost funny to see him move and sway to the beat with his shirt off and sweating. I was so happy to see him so happy.
All in all, it was a great reunion. He headed out to North Carolina on Saturday morning before I woke up. I wish him luck with the baby and congratulations.
I took a few pics at the show:
Good God, Good Show.
Friday, November 14, 2008
The Best Public Notice Ever
This was on the fridge this morning at my place. The dishwasher has been broken for as long as I can remember. Pure hilarity:
Click to zoom
Note: Adrienne (the note leaver) has been my best friend for several years. She never spells my name right, and I always correct her.
Click to zoom
Note: Adrienne (the note leaver) has been my best friend for several years. She never spells my name right, and I always correct her.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Buttons Don't Get Enough Credit
The blouse I'm wearing today is too small. The 3rd button down is so stressed, I feel at any moment it's going to give, and not be a functioning button anymore. I really like the idea of somewhat tight blouses, because it gives off that sort of sexy secretary look, but that 3rd button down endures such hardship because it holds my blouse together at its weakest point... the point that is sometimes called "no mans land"... the point that stretches across my breasts. Here, let me give you a visual:
I can't believe I just posted a picture of my breasts. Anyway, you see what I mean? I feel like saying "Thar she blows!" like it's seriously getting to that point. Even the fabric around the button is stressed. If shirts could scream, I think mine would be right now.
I just unbuttoned the button and I think I heard a sigh of relief.
I can't believe I just posted a picture of my breasts. Anyway, you see what I mean? I feel like saying "Thar she blows!" like it's seriously getting to that point. Even the fabric around the button is stressed. If shirts could scream, I think mine would be right now.
I just unbuttoned the button and I think I heard a sigh of relief.
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
¿Por qué?
I was dumped at 3:11 this afternoon. I'm not really heartbroken, I'm just grieved that, like all my relationships, it was a big waste of time and emotions. Don't get me wrong, I'm upset. Considerably upset, but only because it's times like these that I feel that I will die alone and miserable. I'm too choosy with the men in my life. I want someone very specific, and because of the specificalities, I end up settling on one or more conditions/stipulations to my ideal mate. Those settlements get me into trouble. But it's impossible to find one that meets all my requirements. It's stupid the way I do this. I should just drop all the stips and go out with everyone who asks. Then decipher their flaws and eliminate the guy based on my discoveries.
It's seldom that someone has the balls to walk up to me on the street and ask me out, but it happened yesterday, coincidentally. It was so adorable. He was this little Mexican (I think) guy who asked if I was free for coffee. I turned him down, but maybe I'll reconsider based on knowledge that came to light at 3:11 this afternoon. Hopefully he's still standing there.
I don’t know why I felt the need to blog about this. I know I do get somewhat personal about things going on in my life on this blog, but not that I was dating someone. We weren’t in a serious relationship, but it still hurts to hear that he no longer wishes to see me.
I’m not looking for pity. Please don’t take pity on me. I’ll find someone else soon enough and all this will be dust in the wind.
It's seldom that someone has the balls to walk up to me on the street and ask me out, but it happened yesterday, coincidentally. It was so adorable. He was this little Mexican (I think) guy who asked if I was free for coffee. I turned him down, but maybe I'll reconsider based on knowledge that came to light at 3:11 this afternoon. Hopefully he's still standing there.
I don’t know why I felt the need to blog about this. I know I do get somewhat personal about things going on in my life on this blog, but not that I was dating someone. We weren’t in a serious relationship, but it still hurts to hear that he no longer wishes to see me.
I’m not looking for pity. Please don’t take pity on me. I’ll find someone else soon enough and all this will be dust in the wind.
To those who put their shit where it doesn't belong: (an open letter)
To whoever shit in the shower this morning (and anyone else who shits in places other than the toilet):
You're sick. There's nothing like waking up at 6:30 in the morning, going to the shower to bathe, and finding someone else's SHIT (or mud or whatever) on the floor of the shower. I mean, SERIOUSLY?! I hope you weren't planning on keeping that little bundle of joy, because I cleaned it up and flushed it. Don't try to blame it on the cat. The cat doesn't jump in to a bathtub to shit on a hard surface. Plus, that was a lot of shit. I think I can distingush human shit from cat shit. In the future, if you accidentally don't make it to the toilet, please be kind enough to clean up your shit. Don't leave it for someone else to clean.
To everyone else, be ever-mindful that shit is everywhere.
Keep your shit where it belongs,
Claire
*UPDATE: So we found out that one of the cats is very sick and is shitting in places other than the litter box... apparently.
You're sick. There's nothing like waking up at 6:30 in the morning, going to the shower to bathe, and finding someone else's SHIT (or mud or whatever) on the floor of the shower. I mean, SERIOUSLY?! I hope you weren't planning on keeping that little bundle of joy, because I cleaned it up and flushed it. Don't try to blame it on the cat. The cat doesn't jump in to a bathtub to shit on a hard surface. Plus, that was a lot of shit. I think I can distingush human shit from cat shit. In the future, if you accidentally don't make it to the toilet, please be kind enough to clean up your shit. Don't leave it for someone else to clean.
To everyone else, be ever-mindful that shit is everywhere.
Keep your shit where it belongs,
Claire
*UPDATE: So we found out that one of the cats is very sick and is shitting in places other than the litter box... apparently.
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Blogger Blockage
I have blogger's block. And I've been sick, so I should be chugging NyQuil, inducing a coma, and while not deep in hibernation, blogging. but I can't. I have blogger's block! It's so frustrating! I started writing about how my friend's neighbor tried to take down a 40-foot live tree with a chain and a 2-wheel drive Toyota pick-up and the hilarity that ensued, but it wasn't funny. At all. So I trashed it. It was one of those things that was really funny when it was happening, but not really funny on paper (or on screen). So, why would I bore my readers with not funny stories about rednecks doing redneck things with their trucks? Thanks, but I'll spare you. I'm blaming my blogger blockage on the fact that I've been a total hermit and haven't left the house in 3 days, except for the random errand to get more NyQuil, or Kleenex with lotion in them--and aloe (God help me if I get chaffed nose). I haven't been able to interact with interesting people or situations, so you get this post: My blogger blockage post. I know! It's lame. Hope you enjoyed it. Good bye.
HA! Just kidding, I'm not done. Let's talk current events.
News Flash: This is not a political blog, so please refrain from comments about how it's the end of the world and the country is being run by a Muslim socialist. I don't care what your republican parents or children told you.
Another news flash: anytime someone starts out a statment with the words "News" and "Flash", it's probably not going to be positive. It's probably going to be slightly passive-aggresive... or it's going to be an actual news flash on a news program.
anyway, Obama is the prez elect. I don't know about you, but I'm pretty excited about it. He is truly someone I can believe in, and I think he'll do great things for this country. I've liked this one since day 1... or like day 236, but still. I liked Obama for a while and voted for him... twice. however, he has quite a mess to clean up.
The gays are all up in arms about Prop 8. I heard that they started a protest in LA yesterday, which turned into a parade, which turned into a "gay riot", which was basically gays swarming cars occupied by Tila Tequila, but whatever. Gays can riot, too. I think people should do what they wanna do, end of discussion. Marriage should be between 2 humans (preferably adults), without any questions asked. I makes me kind of angry that we live in a world that 1 out of 2 people thinks that gays shouldn't have the same rights as straight people. It's sick. 1 out of 2 people look at a homosexual and think, "that's not a real person that should deserve the same rights."
that's all for now, everyone. have a pleasant rest of your morning and afternoon.
HA! Just kidding, I'm not done. Let's talk current events.
News Flash: This is not a political blog, so please refrain from comments about how it's the end of the world and the country is being run by a Muslim socialist. I don't care what your republican parents or children told you.
Another news flash: anytime someone starts out a statment with the words "News" and "Flash", it's probably not going to be positive. It's probably going to be slightly passive-aggresive... or it's going to be an actual news flash on a news program.
anyway, Obama is the prez elect. I don't know about you, but I'm pretty excited about it. He is truly someone I can believe in, and I think he'll do great things for this country. I've liked this one since day 1... or like day 236, but still. I liked Obama for a while and voted for him... twice. however, he has quite a mess to clean up.
The gays are all up in arms about Prop 8. I heard that they started a protest in LA yesterday, which turned into a parade, which turned into a "gay riot", which was basically gays swarming cars occupied by Tila Tequila, but whatever. Gays can riot, too. I think people should do what they wanna do, end of discussion. Marriage should be between 2 humans (preferably adults), without any questions asked. I makes me kind of angry that we live in a world that 1 out of 2 people thinks that gays shouldn't have the same rights as straight people. It's sick. 1 out of 2 people look at a homosexual and think, "that's not a real person that should deserve the same rights."
that's all for now, everyone. have a pleasant rest of your morning and afternoon.
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